Acceptance is Key

As with many medical diagnoses, PTSD has many layers. While navigating our everyday struggles, we may find ourselves comparing our current abilities to those of others—or even to our own past selves. There was a time before PTSD truly impacted us, when we were able to do much more than we can now.

When you see someone easily accomplishing something you were once able to do, but now find impossible, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparison. Putting yourself down or wishing things were different can feel like an automatic reaction. Accepting your current abilities as enough can be challenging to understand and embrace.

I struggle with this issue a lot. There was a time when I was independent and capable of so much. Now, there are moments when I can’t even carry on a conversation. My brain might go completely blank, or I might forget the topic entirely. My memory, which used to be fantastic—I could recall events, numbers, faces, names, times, and locations—has now become unreliable. This has been happening to me for years. I don’t know if it will ever change, but accepting this as my new normal is still disappointing. Still, there are times when things surprise me in a positive way. For example, every once in a while, I can recall something important just when I need it. Some days are better than others, and even small improvements, like finishing a conversation or remembering a detail without help, feel like hope. Those moments remind me that progress, while slow, is possible.

However, I’ve also developed coping skills to manage these challenges. On days when my brain feels blank, I do nothing. I call these "zombie days." When it comes to reading lengthy or complex documents, I rely on my husband for help. If a time comes when I no longer have his support, I’ll need to find someone else trustworthy to assist me.

Everyone manages these challenges differently, and what works for me might be different for someone else. I would love to hear about any coping skills or strategies that others have found helpful. Sharing our experiences can help us all discover new ways to support ourselves through tough moments.

I’ve accepted that I forget many things—sometimes even events that happened earlier that day or the day before. My family and I have come to terms with this, and they give me grace when I struggle with memory lapses. If anyone needs something from me, I make it a point to explain that I have PTSD and share what I’m experiencing at that moment, such as my brain not functioning as it should.

There’s no shame in experiencing mental health challenges. The other day, I forgot how to write my own name. I was literally in the middle of writing it when my hand and brain just stopped. I said aloud, “I forgot how to write my name,” and took a moment to let it come back to me—which it eventually did.

Because of this, I have added a checklist for you to print. When my brain isn't working, checklists keep me on track with basic needs. I've included a printable checklist to help maintain focus and support routine. To use the checklist, keep it in a place you see regularly, like the

fridge or by your bed, and check off each item as you complete it throughout the day. You can also personalize the checklist by adding your own items or rearranging tasks to match your routine. Adjust it as needed so it makes the most sense to you.

To Do list for hard PTSD days.pdf

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